Here is my first post on “running thoughts”…
Will not start from my first run, or race, I will start from the last one; a 100 km road race with + 2700 m elevation gain.
Well, it is a kind of “first race” as it is the first race here in Japan. Something I wanted strongly.
After one year spent in Australia where the highest “mountain” available for my daily training was Mt. Coot-tha. A source of infinite nice trails but with the height of only 287 m was absolutely not enough to be prepared to such a great difference in level.
In spite of being well prepared for the distance I put a lot of effort in my trainings on Mt. Rokko (931 m) that was just out of my door, back in Nada-ku. Well, the thing I enjoyed more than preparing such a great event was running free and happy in the woods… but this is another story with its own consequences…
Here is my thoughts and evaluations I made during and after the race.
…after few kilometers I was trying to imagine what kind of beast I would have had to meet this time.
I gave a name to all the beast I found until now…
I have learnt that when you give a name to the beast, the beast disappear.
Knowledge and awareness can erase any fear.
Suddenly I understood one of the most important thing about running… Maybe about life.
There is no beast, I am the beast.
Everything is the result, the natural, obvious consequence of what I have done, what I am doing, thinking and wanting.
Therefore I can manage.
This way something funny happened during the race. Every time I was facing a hard moment (knowing about the beast won’t prevent pain or suffering though) some of the beasts I already knew, usually dressed as dark thoughts, turned into comic figures… like the caricature of themselves.
And I laughed at my fears and weaknesses in the best way I could have done. Pushing.
Anyway in this race I didn’t have any sort of deep introspection or epiphany or any feeling of emptiness or loneliness.
Maybe because I was on road surrounded by many people for most of the time of the race (!!).
Trails help more with it I guess.
The only thing I found was just running; the pure beauty of movement and constant effort.
More like what I usually experience during a marathon.
Maybe I need more distance… or speed…or adventure…
Maybe all of them.
But this is only about my mind; my body, for the moment, is “happy” this way.